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The Mind Project #1

Perception: Choose Your Truth Wisely.

Perception is real science; good, bad or indifferent what we believe to be truth creates a most certain outcome in our lives and manifests in our physical well-being. If we are truly honest with ourselves to take a closer look the journey to here we can almost certainly realize which path was followed. When we came to the fork in the road did we choose a perception meant to yield a positive return? Did we even realize we came to a fork in the road? Becoming hypnotized by habit is what can happen and maybe we perceived the whole thing all wrong. Possible? Absolutely. Now we have to undo that autopilot in order to notice the fork is even there. Then make the wise choice on what you will perceive as true. Why go down a road that leads to nowhere?

Perception can affect:

  1. Relationships
  2. Health & Well Being
  3. Finances
  4. (Everything)

You make a choice. You face a fork in the road at all times. Choice. What you perceive as true has a direct connection to where you will land. If you desire positive results (who would not?) then I ask, are you choosing the right perception? Since we are the captains of our own ships – where we steer our vessel is where it will certainly go.

This does not mean we choose to have the wool over our eyes or romanticize tragedy – quite the contrary. If you choose your perception to be on the Opportunistic path (for example, “What am I to learn from this.” vs. woe is me)  then you are sharpening your tools, you have chosen well this time. Your body, your life, and those around you will reap all the benefits of your choices. It is all relative, and yes, it is all in your mind.

ACTION: You already know that perception and opportunity are your most powerful tools – perhaps you just needed a reminder. You never learn though without taking Action: Practice. Choose a path that serves you, not one that disturbs you and see where it takes you. Teach it forward.

Mentally Drained? 6 steps to Rehab & Re-Energize Willpower and Direction

Ever feel so tired, that you might have said “I’ve lost my will to….” for something? Or, “how did I let this happen?” Are you seeing the signs? You haven’t lost it – you are just tired and in need of a big Energy Boost in the will department. I believe we all do need a reset from time to time. We all need to strength train our willpower when it’s tired and used up. The battery can get low without us even knowing it. I admit, I originally created this post as “begin again” love letter….etc. It had a lot of private exposed vulnerable sentiments, and some deep issues to work out personally for me that I shared. But now that I have had sleep and hopeful gain, I have to keep you in mind and keeping it positive for us to learn together. It became clearer to me that I was struggling with just this – frustration at a wrong turn and where I felt my willpower was weak. It certainly is not weak, but it needs a little more love in the strength department today. Here’s my “begin again” post that hopefully inspires you to recognize the beauty in an err of ways. May it be a turning point so that you become so grateful to have the luxury of focusing on more upsides than down- in fact very big gains for us in our futures when it does happen. Yes, of course, deal with the hard stuff but lead with the positives. I know this in my heart fully now that strong love prevails even through tough times. Perfect example: Positive: I chose the right person to fall with, and get back up with. I am also so lucky and inspired by this one incredible person who makes me want to write and share and learn more about us and why we are who we are…and then some. It makes us stronger. Now talking about prevailing let’s highlight a few ways to wake up that strong will you do have and gift it a boost of energy right this minute:

Rehabilitation: To heal properly if talking about the will that has an injury or exhaustion, you must build more strength back into it gradually. It’s not forever – it’s just for a concentrated period of time until it is strong again. You need to re-program or reboot and see what directory needs to have a new pathway. To hit all brains here I’ll call it:

Strength Training the Will from “system error” or “not responding”

1. Look at the positives FIRST before anything and start listing them out. (This “first always gratitude” method helps put you in a positive state to then be more receptive to handling the next difficult & not so easy steps) Don’t worry – you’ll get to the hard stuff shortly.

2. Identify a set of signals and use them as your “reset” to neutral – an alarm that you are heading in the wrong direction to help alert you to turn. Like a “code blue.”Responding is what you eventually want versus reacting. This is a tough one, I know first hand.

3. Write a set of do’s and don’ts and then come to grips with it. Then write out the ifs. Read them often until they are set in so they are part of your mantra again. At a minimum, speak them to yourself often even if you do not write them.

4. Ask for help (or accept help) Often a trusted other may relate and it helps us too to realize that we are not alone. But remember to ask the right person – someone who will help to build you up not bring you down.

5. Focus on one thing at a time. As time passes that one area is so strong, then you move on to the next. Will is so strong, it catches momentum the more love and positive attention you give it.

6. Letting Go. All the above is great – but if you do not know what your goals and dreams are, and are not willing to ask yourself “is this the best for my dreams and goals?” We want the best, and saying no is hard when we feel “no” as a loss. No is not a loss, it is a choice and a key to unlock your true will forward! It is letting go – for me the hardest skill to learn (and relearn.) Why? We deserve the best and if we don’t get the best we suffer, and all those around us will suffer too.

Even just the little adjustments can result in bigger change and stronger gains. Simply being aware is even a huge beginning to the process. Believe in rebuilding and getting stronger. We wonder what it feels like to be normal when we physically or emotionally get hurt or sick. We get anxious about the time it takes to heal. We do have to let go of the demons and start working on building strength – now is a great time. Remember you have to start somewhere. I’m right here with you so Let’s do this.

Lack, Loss, Ailing? Hug this:

How our bodies and our minds speak to one other is fascinating and very revealing. You and I aren’t ailing because we pulled a muscle, slept wrong, or did not cover our heads when it was cold out. Our bodies are trying to tell us something – are we truly listening? I thought I was in control of it all, and let me tell you first hand that I try super hard and I’m sure you do too. I’m a researcher until I get an answer that makes total sense – then I try it out completely. It turns out that I may be way more stubborn in the listening department than I’d like to believe. I just found out that doing all the right things and missing the one element of “coping” will rear it’s ugly head as a strange ailment or far worse – a diagnosis we are scared to even think about. I had to share this right away. Yes they are connected in both directions effecting every single aspect of us. Are you willing to try consider my method with me before we are in full denial? Pictured above is of the base of the bok choy I bought at the market this weekend when I thought at first, maybe I just am not eating “enough healing foods…” Read on.

I am in need of healing. I want to share with you what I only just recently discovered about how to best cope with these feelings and how to prepare for only the best you deserve for yourself and myself before it gets uglier. And…it goes way beyond healing foods. I recently learned about “virus” ailing, and root cause. You need to address the healing foods, the movements, and the emotions equally. I was just powering through all the “loss” or lack I felt. I was”zennified” and practicing mind control, and all the right foods. Researched like a champ (because that’s what I do.) Exercised as if I was going to battle. I developed all the right habits, rituals, mindsets, exercises, and behaviors. The ailments got better, in fact went a way (for a while.) But they just came screeching back and now taking on new forms. What happened? What did I miss? Now what? Well apparently I was not mourning the “losses” I was powering through all along. Once I rewire myself to actually feel loss, process it, and see it for the new beginning it really is- am I ever going to  heal. I am writing this because I myself am in a big healing process, and realize that I have to process it all before I “just look forward and Warrior-on.” Let’s promise one another to be better at processing so that we may move on in the best way – completely. How can I be best available to others and have wonderful relationships if I am not yet fully available to myself?! I’m learning, I’m learning, I’m learning. Learn with me:

Here’s my checklist that helps me feel Joy even while still “on an ongoing healing journey:”

  • It is a loss, and allow myself to mourn.
    • Holding in pain will creep up elsewhere and manifest in my body that no medicine will fix (hello!)
  • Do this while trusting my own inner Wisdom:
    • When loss is not in my control:
      • See loss as a “season” which came to an end, and this is how the universe ultimately makes room for a new beginning that’s already in progress (an area we can’t control)
      • Have More Gratitude for this situation or person or whatever change – which is part of your big design to ultimately bring you here & now.
      • Send them or it Light & Love to the cause, and still allow yourself to be angry (Forgiveness) and learn why you are angry so it can be pin pointed.
      • Am I  angry because whatever it is that happened crossed a lot of boundaries? or values? Was I comfortable and all of the sudden there is change? This is a good thing – anger helps you recognize what you stand for. It’s healthy. How do you cope with the anger so it’s not so destructive is the Key. (keep reading)
    • If Loss was my decision – I see it as a Necessary Ending (see Dr. Henry Cloud) and that I have chosen well and now I  will “Never Look Back” and move forward with my good decision to make room in my life for the best that’s aligned with my values, truths, and fulfillment (see Kent Julian.)
    • Patience that “Me” by design needs to go through whatever it is I am going through to learn and to be patient, to only be in control of that which I am only able to be in control of! (Letting go of control)
    • Anger – write letters (and never send them) Allow time to express anger (role play with someone I trust) so that I can have “closure.”
    • Closure will not always come in the form of making “amends” with the person or place. That will carry more anger! Your mind will carry it with you and so will your body – forever unless you process this. Create closure in a safe, healthy, and positive way. That you can control. Meditate then on seeing that ending in a positive way if I could not have it actually happen the way I thought. Closure is a powerful Visualization that must happen and I control my vision.
    • Moving on – takes time.  You know your body, and your self very well – don’t let yourself get into replacements or finding the quick fix. The more you see this as a real Season, and approach all in this manner time will pass quicker.
    • Look around you  and think in your mind: what are those people and places and situations that make you feel good? Get them at the beginning and Ending of your day to work this way no matter what you do. If you can’t physically be there, get there in your mind.
    • Do you know someone who you really want to hug? Trust yourself, you can find at least one person. Just HUG THEM and you will not only heal yourself, you will also heal them. (that’s an amazing win-win.) Healing touch, especially when faced with the loss of a lover needs to be found. You know the world changes when you hold someone’s hand whom excites you – you feel the energy transferred back and fourth…. Hugs can be just as beautiful.

And now I end with this most important part – Getting our mind and body connected and feeling good starts with this important writing practice I’ve put into place:

The GRATITUDE LIST

  • Everything you have this minute in your life that you are grateful for – be it small or large- Write it. Type it. Don’t cut the list short – try to think of everything and keep writing. Or a person. Write everything you Like about this person. And yourself. Write everything you are so proud of. Only the good stuff. Write it down every morning, and night.Writing reaches your mind more than just saying it to yourself. Do both – Trust me.
  • Rest, Eat well, and take it easy on yourself! Nurture yourself during this time instead of becoming a Warrior. That cortisol hormone will escalate super high during this time, and you must be focused on resting and nurturing so you can heal and bring those levels down. I say this only because I too became a Warrior during my tough times, and found I had some battle scars that I did not let heal. Cortisol took over. There is no honor in “toughing it through.” It is no longer good practice  to “shake it off.” I got your back on this one, it’s a biggie so keep reading. Your adrenals are acting up, or not acting up enough – and the stress you are feeling is trying to make a home in your body.

I promise you, if you are in this place, you are not alone. I too am going through this. I switch off from “me” to “you” to keep it balanced in my writing as you notice – no mistake there. You will become stronger just by going through this tough time as will I. I write this as a letter to myself, as well as to you whomever you are. I am finding this feeling is all around me, and to know that I am not alone makes me feel a little more sane. I need to know that I am not alone, and I am proud to say that I am not a lonely person yet I do know that I genuinely do need the positive support of others, human touch, and a healthy body mind relationship so that I too may heal. It’s part of my makeup. And I’m so darn tough that I sometimes just need a shoulder to  cry on, and not be judged. It’s part of my healing and I will not stop it any longer. Pets are good for healing  too. That’s a whole other blog. Hey, I need a hug!

Finding Your Rhythm: Honor the Music Within You…

This is a picture is of my brother Seth while he was passionately playing Whipping Post by the Allman Brothers Band. This was years ago, but I remember it like it was yesterday! I took this shot with my then cell phone, and it came out pretty amazing. Not as amazing as he sounded however – and he’s definitely found his Rhythm. What a night, what a musician. And it goes beyond bias here – he’s really nailed it. (And not to mention mastering my favorite band’s song – double bonus.)

Honor The Music Within you – was painted on a mug I bought as a souvenir while in Nashville last month. I gave it to my brother, I could not imagine a better statement for this person. I love his passion, I love the music he has within him. I love him on top of all that. He has what most people yearn for their whole lives.

What is your “music?” Is it finding out what moves you, what calls your heart, your body and your soul? There are times when I find it hard to figure out what my music is. My taste changes from here to there. Narrow it down to just actual music – that I can do (sort of.) Today I listened to a song I have not heard in 10 years because I probably over played it back then. I fell right back in love with it again. And I’m over playing it right now as I write this. When the Levy Breaks, Led Zeppelin – It brings me back to a great time in my life when I first really “heard” music. I remember longer drives back then just listening to wonderful music. The late nights that I spend now just listening to great music, there’s a soundtrack to my life. Maybe I’m not a musician (although I’ve dabbled a bit with instruments) and maybe I am a listener. Funny – that’s so me.

There are times when I find it hard to figure out what my music is. Or maybe I’m looking too hard? I guess you can say a lot of things feel like my music. I’m moved by so much, maybe I’m not a one-song gal. I just couldn’t tell you exactly what my rhythm is -might I be beautifully broken?

Well, truth be told, I think maybe I am finding my own rhythm now many years later than I thought originally. I am listening with more appreciation (maybe that is maturity) and have developed so much gratitude that I am able to honor someone else’s rhythm fully, even if I don’t know what mine is. That’s what I love about writing – I figured all this out just now. Would you look at that! So here’s a great question – if we don’t know what our music is, are we mature enough to honor someone else’s? Honor – not envy, nor jealous of, nor want for ourselves? I have truly always honored my brother’s music – but even more now that I realize he’s figured something out that most of us are still trying to get a grasp on.

Driving Time: 3 Ways to Stay Focused with Life’s Many Distractions

When you drive a vehicle you quickly learn it’s critical to keep your head and your eyes looking in the direction you want to go (in front of you) or you will end up in the woods.

Life is full of distractions these days, and our goals whatever they may be, require our laser focus in order to not fall off track. This requires a good strategy, practice, and persistence. If we let everything take away from our focus, we’ll remain distracted and frustrated people without any control of our own time. Time is our most valuable asset so let us increase those focus muscles:

The Strategy: 3 Keys to deal with common distractions:

  1. PREPARATION: Create Time Blocks; set aside allocated time to allow for emergencies, returning calls, emails, texts, visits, and other situations that may require or pull you away from the task at hand.
  2. ANTICIPATE & COMMUNICATE BOUNDARIES: Share with others that this is dedicated time and will reply when you are able to at another designated time (email auto replies/automatic text response/voicemail, etc.)
  3. FOLLOW THROUGH!

Action step: Snap Out of It and Focus!

The Olympics of Change: Become unstuck in business and in life.

published originally 8/10/16

Keeping in the spirit of the Summer Olympics, we get to witness the world’s most awe inspiring athletes challenging themselves beyond physical and mental limits. That makes it a perfect time for us to re-assess our own challenges in business, relationships, health and personal goals. Universally, change no matter what size, carries a lot of weight – but it doesn’t have to. Change can come in many flavors: perspective, paradigm shift, habit, response, reaction, or process. Idea: Give that autopilot a little coffee break and determine if the current route is truly the best one. Use this as a tool for change management; assess pain points and flush them out.

  1. Evaluate & assess current situation
  2. Know the Why
  3. Benefits & disadvantages of changing
  4. Benefits & disadvantages for staying the same
  5. Obstacles
  6. Skills & knowledge required
  7. Help from resources, people, or groups
  8. Plan of action & deadlines (calendar)
  9. Monitor & track progress
  10. Repeat!

Many companies are able to go through substantial changes and experience extraordinary results by using a similar process. You and your team will have an improved perspective while getting unstuck and leaping over hurdles like an Olympian.

Here is a Perfect example of needing a change in business: 4 Components of a Successful Document Management Cloud Solution *Read the full newsletter here: http://bit.ly/2bf3QS8

Article written by Laura M. Moutal,  Manager of Marketing & Communications at Atlantic, Tomorrow’s Office

Brain Exercise: Move past FEAR with the Right Action of Write Action.

(republish!) http://www.linkedin.com/pulse/brain-exercise-move-past-fear-right-action-write-laura-m-moutal

When trying to lose weight  those who are most successful write down their goals and keep track of it all day long, every day, until the goal is reached. There is even a fancy app for that kind of goal. These trackers reach their goals, and even if they don’t they get closer to them then they would without it. Plus, they learn a lot about their habits. Life is too busy to rely on just our minds. Our minds drift and life happens. How are we to keep on our targets?

Saving money. Most successful people keep track of what they pay out and how much they save weekly (or lose) monthly, quarterly – so they know where they stand, tweak here and there for the unexpected… and then keep taking steps to correct that budget. Still, it has to be reviewed periodically. Don’t we check our checking, savings and 401k accounts?

If we have integrity and are accountable for our actions, we write it down (or add to a calendar, or add it an app, post it, make an excel sheet, a database…a journal) and that scares some people because it means they have to commit. There’s the excuses, and all the reason why not (and there the brain goes… right into FEAR.)

But if we don’t write it down, and we “play it safe” then we’ll never know how great we could be. It’s like leaving money on the table. Leaving your life in everyone’s hands but our own is not in my make-up. Is it in yours?

When teaching how to use a forecasting tool or CRM, I use the same script. Opportunities. Learn how to see them and then make a plan, adding it to the Calendar and the database to manage your time and your future money. You should be adjusting the opportunities, and minding them every week to move all opportunities in a forward direction (like a checkbook, like life…) Like Exercise, to get results we have to do a little bit every day for a nice long while. Without constantly reviewing your plan, adjusting it, and doing it, it’s a free-fall. If you don’t mind a checkbook or keep track, there’s a hint you need to start taking this Brain exercise seriously. It’s never too late to start. If your team does not agree on the RETURN ON TIME Investment, no one will adapt the right attitude about commitment. Attitudes are contagious.

RETURN ON TIME INVESTMENT. If your team does not agree on this mindset, hurry up and turn them around!

The best investment is  learning Time Management. You must find the time. Those who do not need to be reminded, you should be mentoring someone you feel has “no time” to be reminded. Or add on for you smart ones: you are already doing it in one area of your life, why not update your other areas? You could be more amazing but you won’t know until you start. Don’t let FEAR replace the right actions. Time is something we cannot get back.

 

Chasing sunrise

It’s here. You found me. Now let’s explore! As I write articles, they are purely inspired by events and truths personally I wish to share. Maybe I will inspire you. Write to me and let me know how you feel about it.

I started April 2nd 2016 on a mission to wake up early, and chase the sunrise. It was early enough to see the moon and stars, and then sit and take in the spring air. I would write, look up with excitement, write some more. Then as the sun would peak just above the horizon I would wrap up the writing and get moving along the path. Each moment and corner took on a unique and awe inspiring view. I do not have enough memory in my “smart phone” to capture it all. I do practice mindfulness here, and not everything needs to be on film (ahem- digital.) So I chose one moment from each day as a digital memory, a reminder that I chased, and then was gifted with the reward of such a beautiful view.

The most fascinating thing to me is that I grew up walking in the same spot and all my life have found myself seeing completely different things – animals, views, people, feelings … and it may just be that because I am so inspired it will always be this way here or everywhere. I know that lots of people feel this way about their special places – in fact we may have that same special place. I bet your view is completely unique however- and that’s what I love about it. In the winter I still do this occasionally, but the darkness and cold is not as safe as spring, summer, and fall. I managed to chase the sunrise every morning wherever I was for 215 days (that I recorded.)

What I remember most about that first drive to that spot that early morning – I was listening to a really great “State” changing song. I was in a super great state. I was excited to see some beauty and get nature all to myself for a while. I was proud of myself for just getting up and doing it – and the idea that this time, it was not just to get a run in. I became aware that I was in fact chasing something. What sunrise are you chasing?

Teach it FORWARD

The value of a “coach” approach to business and relationships.

Teaching, Coaching & Mentoring are habits we can cultivate inside and outside of our job titles. In business, sharing insights and skills are what help teams and organizations grow. Likewise, in families, communities, and personal relationships, teaching encourages growth and trust. Studies show that managers and team mates have better relationships when they use bilateral coaching methods (they coach you, and you coach them.) This approach shows interest and trust. It boils down to sharing and develops selfless relationships. Does your organization or do you have a skill that could be approached in this manner? Thankful for a skill you have learned? Send a thank you note, and pay it forward. Gratitude is an incredibly contagious habit to teach forward.

Benefits of Teaching, Coaching & Mentoring:

  • Help someone improve their skills
  • Refine your own skills
  • Develop positive relationships
  • Encourage someone to teach it forward

When the teacher is ready, the student appears…

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